My Postpartum Depression (Part One)

Over five years ago, shortly after having my daughter, Olive, I was struck with postpartum depression. 

Duuuuuudes. Hard. Stuff. 

I wasn’t sure what was going on, because I wasn’t sitting around crying like I did the first few weeks after having my first child, which had been just a couple of years earlier.

No. This was different, and it was scary. 

There were no tears.

My Olive. 

My Olive. 

Instead, there were irrational, obsessive thoughts; stacked, one, on top of the other, on top of the other.

They didn’t make sense and I knew that.

They were not rational and I knew that. 

But they were persistent and heavy and scary.

And they felt very, very real.

For instance, when my baby cried I knew for sure, FOR SURE, she was dying. I would go weak in my knees.

I would have to sit down. Because I felt like I was going to faint from the (very real) thought of it….

Of course, if I tried to verbalize this, but I knew how ‘crazy’ it sounded.

It still felt so very, very real.

Amidst this madness, I would also get stuck in various ‘thought loops’ about things that had happened, and I couldn’t change, and I would obsess on them.

OBSESSSSSS.

Truly, this was a mental hell.

This wasn’t my first dance with feeling totally and utterly crazy, unfortunately.

About five years before that, I was dealing with migraines. So many migraines!

My doctor at the time prescribed me a particular seizure medicine which was thought to help with migraines. Within a few short weeks, I was experiencing regular panic attacks.

It took me a while to put together that the new medicine was CAUSING the panic attacks… So I got to experience A LOT of them…

Now, if you’re not accustomed to panic attacks, it may just sound like a bad case of anxiety. 

But if you’ve experienced one, you know they equate more accurately to heart attacks.

Seriously! Oodles of people go to the ER thinking they are having a heart attack, when it’s really their first dance with a panic attack.

While experiencing a panic attack, my body would ‘freeze up"

and my mind would go on overdrive, almost like in those cartoons where a machine goes out of whack, freaks out, sputters, and then let’s out a loud KABOOM. (And then it’s broken.)

That’s what it felt like, anyway.

There are more stories that have made mental wellness a VERY big priority of mine, and one that happened fairly recently…

(WhewWeeee…. that one was a doozy!), but this feels like enough vulnerability for now (gulp.)

What I REALLY want to say is… my BIG aha, was NOT just that I learned how to manage my mind, although that has been extremely useful.

Mindset is just one piece of the puzzle. A VERY important piece, but just A piece, nonetheless.

And that is why I am telling you this story.

Because I want to share my even bigger A-HA with you.

And if I can… alleviate some unnecessary suffering.

More to come…

-Sylvia

The Power of Meditation: Strengthen the Immune System, Lower Stress & So Much More...

All Good Things

Unless you've been living under a rock, you probably know that meditation is good for you.

And in case you have been living under a rock, here's the deal: Oooodles of scientific studies have proven the outstanding benefits of meditation!

Meditation has be proven to help lower stress, anxiety, and blood pressure.

It helps with stress, overwhelm, and focus issues...

And! It can help strengthen the immune system as well as slow down the aging process.
It LITERALLY changes your brain. ...Yes, way! 

MEDITATION IS LIKE A DOSE OF HAPPY.

Guided Meditation for Beginners

But I know it can be intimidating to start. Or, maybe you HAVE NO CLUE HOW to start!

It doesn't have to be some 45 minute thing. 

You can start by taking a mindful minute to turn off your brain and tune into your breath.

OR, YOU CAN START BY LISTENING TO SOME GUIDED MEDITATIONS...

Those are my personal favorites!

There are tons out there and they can be great for adults and kids, too.

WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO LOSE?

Let me know if you have any favorite guided meditations you listen to regularly... I'd love to hear from you!

- Sylvia

Do You Need To Zoom Out?

Have you heard that saying: You can't see the forest for the trees? I am not sure why, but it keeps popping up in conversations I've been having. For some reason, lots of people (myself included) can't see the forest for the trees!

Before I go deeper, can I just say: yes. Yes, I agree. The wording of this is odd. We don't really speak like this, so the saying gets a well-deserved reputation.

But, for the sake of a learning experience, we'll forgive that for now, ok?

So, what does it mean 'not to be able to see the forest for the trees?'

Well, to reword precisely for clarity, it means:

You can't see the forest BECAUSE OF the trees!

Isn't it funny? The forest is only a forest because of the trees!

Now, taking it a step further... what this saying really means is: we get sucked in to our lives so deeply that we forget that the forest of life IS COMPOSED OF TREES!

We forget that there is a whole forest of beauty and possibility within ANY given moment we are presented with. We get so zoomed in, checking tasks off our list, doing, doing, doing, that we forget why we do any of it at all.

So, what can you do when you realize you can't see the forest for the trees? 

The best waker-uppers come in the form of a question.

Here are a few questions to help you get a fresh perspective:

Simply ask yourself:

  • What really matters most?
  • How can I raise my vibration RIGHT now?
  • How can I zoom out?
  • How can I wake up?
  • What do I really want?
  • Who am I really? 

 

– Sylvia

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